my blog was dead for few months =x was busy with my study life lately, was offered by government to study teacher course, which i wished for so long, although the course is not as wad i wished for, but teaching in kindergarden is almost the same as teaching in primary school (i guess), wad to do? since i had been offered to teach kindergarden .__.
there is a huge gap between me and dafeiyangq, since i got tis teacher course offered, and since he changed his job, he is working as a "supervisor" in a factory, and he is very busy for his work everyday, included saturday and sunday .__. and he started to smoke since he changed tis job, or mb b4 he changed tis job?? i was disappointed with him coz he knew i super duper hate ppl smoke! he promised not to smoke in front of me, but i still cant accept the fact tht he is smoking! haihs..
due to both of us r in our busy life, we lack of communication, and we always quarrel, bcoz he smokes? bcoz he busy? bcoz my temper? bcoz we r in different line? i am a future teacher, and he smokes -.- and he talk bad words.. problems keep occuring and we din overcome it, we seem like nth now, but how abt future?
yday he told me tht he has to learn many things in short time, coz his boss feels like his fren is better than him, although he work longer than his fren, i duno y his boss got such feeling? juz bcoz his fren noe more machines than him? then how abt admin jobs? he seems nth when he told me these things, but i can feel tht he is very stress from his voice, he is trying so hard for our future (i guess? or mb his future?), and how abt me? what can i do? i was like keep blaming him for being busy, i cant even help him anything, the only thing tht i can do is to stay by his side, and support him no matter wad (not included smoking)
he always keep his problem and face it alone, mb he duwan me to worry him, and i feel so guilty for not helping him, and still need him to worry me, i juz hope tht he is not giving himself too much pressure, and hope he know that i will always support him :)
been constrained for a long time, trying to stop myself from blogging, i noticed that my blog was full of unhappy things, should post some happy things here, but happy memories do passed quickly, why sad memories always motionless??
lately, emotion turns up and down easily, can be happy at this moment, but few seconds later, become very down. is it because of the work pressure? or is it because of...........
lately, sky keep raining, is it because it knew my feelings? or is it the end of the world coming?? water accompany me all the times, is it tears? no! its not, just too much water.. have to release some for it to become balance
lately, many thoughts appeared in my mind, good and bad thoughts mixed up, made me felt dizzy, my head gonna exploded, am i thinking too much? yes, you always said so and always sing that song, but you never continue the lyrics..
lately, love to download songs, maybe songs are the only thing i can rely, songs can release ones stress, and also provide physical and mental relaxation :)
although its weekend, but i totally no weekend mood, coz i hv to work on Saturday and Sunday! super sien!!
lately, sch hving exam, tht means more works to do, coz hv to mark, mark till i very pek cek, coz its very hard 2 giv marks .__. i hv virtually become very hot temper
no ppl will understand how i feel, sometime i think its good for me not to exist, it might be the best solution to avoid quarrels.. sometime favouritism do exist, both working, but y i cant tired, another one can? y i cant nap at afternoon, while another can? y i m the 1 tht always get scolded?? i m the one tht woke up early to work, while another's working hours is totally diff.. why??!!!!!
work place is like a battlefield, everyday reach office den work non stop, time not enough use..
house is like a hotel, full of cold and cheerless, my room is the warmest place
first year valentine and Chinese New Year r in the same day, another year cant celebrate valentine with him, mb he felt relieved coz no need to think wad to buy, or no need to fan how to celebrate?? but i think as long as he treat me good, its already ok liao, rite?? maybe..
went to my grandma's hse at Jhor Bahru for reunion dinner, saw many free pretty fireworks, those fireworks like no need money like tht, so many and so beautiful, was thinking if watch at beach will be more romantic :)
came back to kl on Chu 1, was super tired coz fall sick =.= cough, sore throat and a bit fever, bought some medi to eat, hope it will recover soon .__.
was so upset coz my hp dropped on the floor, it has a crack at the screen, consider big crack coz from left to right T__T so heart pain to see it when i use my hp, but still hv to use it coz no money to buy a new 1 .__.
tis cny will be very bz, coz 2ml is daddy's birthday, chu 3 mb go out shopping, chu 4 mb go chee's hse bai nian, chu 5 - chu 8 need to go Hatyai..
cant wait to go Hatyai, coz i wana buy many thgs =x n oso wana eat many thgs~~~ hope cough and sore throat will leave me alone!!!!